Desperation creates separation. Whenever we really really need something specific to happen, it actually makes it less likely to happen. When we feel like we can’t live without something or our life will be terrible without it, it creates a sense of fear that only attracts more fear rather than attracting what we want.
For example, if we really really want a new job, and feel like we need it, this lowers our frequency and makes it less likely that we will get the new job. We get too focused on what our ego thinks are important factors in looking for jobs, rather than taking intuitively aligned action on looking for a new job. We bring the fear into the resume writing, the job searching, the phone interview, the in-person interview and the waiting for the call back.
This creates a vibrational frequency that repels what we want. Our brain is so busy worrying about the potential future outcome that we aren’t even able to know what job would be in our highest good. When we are in fear our possibilities are limited. We don’t remember that we are magnificent, limitless beings who are here to follow our joy and truth, not necessarily putting pay or benefits at the top of our job search list.
We aren’t able to be present with our truth that may be telling us to move into a whole different direction. We are also blocked from remembering all the positive things about ourselves to write in the resume and cover letter to the job that we are not even sure we will like. We bring the energy of the desperation into the phone interview, which the employers will feel and unconsciously be repelled by. We bring it into the in-person interview as well, bringing a frequency of “I have to get this job” doesn’t feel good to an employer. It feels like pushiness or anxiety rather than trust in yourself and confidence.
There are many other examples of how desperation creates separation as well. In relationships, if you believe you are going to be lost without your partner and you can’t live without them, this can create anxiety in your interactions within the relationship. It can make you interpret everything your partner does or doesn’t do as indicators of how much they love you, how likely they are to potentially leave and then how you might die because of it.
It can look like asking them too much how they feel about you, or what they are doing or where they are going. It can feel like extreme anxiety and fear of not being ok without them, or a fear of being alone.
This is way too much pressure for any partnership! This can feel like tension, or suffocation or control to your partner, even if it’s under the surface and unspoken. We feel each other. Your vibe speaks louder than your words.
It’s the same with money. If you are desperate for money, you are creating a vibration of lack and wanting more. The fear is going to attract more fear. The feeling of lack attracts more lack. It’s understandable to feel this way, but it just doesn’t work to get you what you want.
In order to get out of this mindset of fear, and lack and desperation, it’s important to remember that you already have and are enough. You are already abundant. You are a full vessel of light, and love and energy. There is enough for everyone.
Coming from this perspective releases desperation. There is nothing to fear when you know you are enough. You don’t need the job or the partnership or the money to make you whole. You are already complete and abundant.
In order to remember this feeling more of the time it’s important to practice. We are all a piece of the divine, we came from the source energy of love and will return to that when we are no longer in a body. We slowly forget that over time so it’s important to do things to help you remember the truth of who you really are, and consistently practice them.
From Desperation to Satisfaction in Work:
Practice appreciation for what you already have and who you are. Gratitude decreases fear and allows you to remember that there is nothing to fear.
Practice stilling your mind and connecting to your intuition to guide you to a job that will feel good to you, rather than one that checks off the boxes.
Practice getting into a high, happy frequency before you do any job-related activity whether it’s searching for a job, writing a resume, or going on an interview.
Remind yourself that there are plenty of jobs out there just waiting for you.
From Desperation to Satisfaction in Relationships:
Practice reminding yourself that you are whole and complete no matter what happens in the relationship.
This doesn’t mean that you don’t want to be with your partner, but the more you remember that you are ok on your own, the better the relationship will feel.
Practice self-love and appreciation. The more you love yourself, the more you can trust and love your partner as well.
From Desperation to Satisfaction with Money:
Practice holding the frequency of abundance rather than lack.
Appreciate the resources you do have, this creates more abundance.
Practice getting into a high frequency any time you interact with money, and picturing and feeling yourself having more money than you actually do.
Money is energy, and we are all energetic beings. Practice feeling the feeling of abundance in a general way, rather than fear and lack. All is well.
We have a choice between fear and love in every moment. Between contraction and expansion. Between desperation and satisfaction.
The really cool part is that we are in charge of our life. We are co-creators of our reality. We have a choice in every moment to release the fear and remember that separation is really an illusion. All is always well, there is nothing to fear.
Read more about Relationship Issues with Shana Olmstead.
