Taking the long view of the holiday season can help us get through with peace, love and gratitude. Especially this year, looking at the big picture and taking a higher perspective about all of it is the only way to move through the season with grace, and to feel energized and calm in January, rather than depleted, emotionally, physically, financially and spiritually.
What if this is just a time to plug in even more to a spiritual connection? What if the lovely dark days are here to help us go even deeper in our self-reflection, rather than looking outwards for things to fill us up? What if there is nothing external that we need, and our internal world is completely magical and transformative?
The most memorable and magical times I’ve had on the holidays have been small and simple. They don’t have to do with any gift I have been given, or gourmet meal, or picture perfectly decorated home. I don’t really have many memories of wonderful gifts, I know I’ve gotten lots, but it’s the feeling I remember, not the actual thing.
My mom was great at finding small and meaningful presents at Christmas. Wrapping little cute things that she knew would make me smile, and writing a lovely card. These are the things I remember most. I remember sitting around a fire telling stories with my family. I remember gathering with family who are no longer with us, all getting the same present from Grandma. I remember lovely delicious imperfect meals, cooking together and sharing love.
We can all take some time and discover what the traditions and special people are in our life and how we want to celebrate that’s just right for us. It doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s holiday season. Taking some time to consider what brings you joy, not just what you think you have to do, is the best way to move through the season.
How do you want to feel in January when Christmas is over? While we spend lots of time and energy making the holiday a special time, it is just as important to think about and honor your future self. How do you want to prepare your lovely future self in order to feel great after this season is over?
Some ways to have a happy and magical holiday while honoring your future self are:
1. Read the Energy Before You Say Yes:
Take time to feel the energy of events before you say yes to anything, even something you feel you “have” to do (the really cool thing is we never “have” to do anything we don’t want, woo hoo!)
Do you have time in your schedule, including time for self-care? Is this event with people you enjoy?
And most importantly, do you feel joyful expansive energy when you consider the invitation? Unless the answer to all of these is a for sure yes, I would strongly encourage you to decline (with love and compassion of course!)
If you’re not used to checking in with yourself about what you really want to do, it can be kind of hard. Especially for kind and empathic souls, we are really good at feeling other people’s feelings but not so good at tuning in to ourselves.
One good way to know your own answers is to get away from other people, spend a few moments in silence, put your hands on your belly, and ask yourself silently or out loud “what is in my highest good about _______ situation?”
If you feel a sense of joy, warmth, peace or happiness, that is usually a good sign that it would be a positive experience for you. If you feel the opposite, well, that is probably a sign that it would be more draining than energizing for you.
Spend that time instead doing something that fills your energy system up. When we are at our best, we can be more generous with all of those in our life.
2. Fill Your Future Self with Positive Energy:
Tune in to how you want January you to feel. Is she/he restful or tired? Or maybe energized and peaceful? Or inspired and ready to start the New Year? What does that version of you need, starting now, in order to feel that way then?
If you adore and cherish future you , take care throughout this time to nurture yourself now and then.
- Be financially responsible with gift giving so future you doesn’t have a crazy big credit card payment in January.
- Take lots of intentional time to maintain a spiritual practice so that future you feels amazingly connected to the universe, rather than drained and disconnected.
- Spend time creating meaningful memories that you will cherish, rather than regretting the moment that you weren’t present with your child, or the one last story you didn’t ask your aging grandmother about. Future you loves to know that you did everything you could to connect to those you love.
- Ask for help, delegate, and say no when you feel like it.
- Spend time with those that fill your energy system up with love, and not with those (even if they’re family members!) that are draining and negative. This again ensures that future you will feel loved and cared about, rather than resentful and frustrated.
3. Remember the Big Picture:
What’s really more important? Health and happiness, financial, emotional, and spiritual, for your family in the long term, or the new pair of super expensive shoes that your teenager wants?
Is the perfect Christmas card portrait really more important than just spending some time playing on the floor with your child?
What choices can you be making now that keep the big picture of what you really want for yourself and your family as a priority?
Can you or you and your family spend some time giving back instead of planning what you want to get for Christmas?
Can you agree to smaller gifts this year in order to plan for something else that is in alignment with your values in the big picture?
4. Self Love:
To give your present and future selves the beautiful gift of love and appreciation is a great way to keep yourself filled up with love and energy this time of the year. There is nothing and no one more important to be giving gifts to right now than you. Do you hear me? I know there are lots of messages out there about giving, and service, and buying things for others, however….
If you don’t give the gift of love, time, self-care and appreciation to yourself there will be nothing left to give the others in your life, or your future self.
Buy yourself a little treat here or there. Say kind and loving things to yourself always. Take time to charge your energy and relax: go to the spa, get a massage, meditate, and stay connected to your spiritual power.
I love love love this time of year, and have gotten much more in alignment with my true self about what it needs to stay happy during this time over the years. I no longer do too much for others, and I realize that staying connected to myself through meditation and spiritual practice is the key for me to know what I need and to be able to stay in balance and joyful all year long.
I hope you can connect to the magic within you and have a fabulous holiday (whatever you celebrate, or not) as well!
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