“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.”
― Lao Tzu
Acceptance. It’s not easy. Much of life’s suffering is due to not accepting what is. This can show up in many different ways.
Currently it can feel hard to accept the reality that we don’t know what’s going to happen next. We don’t know when things will be back to “normal”. We wish there were more answers and that this whole thing wasn’t happening.
Acceptance to me doesn’t mean to give up. It doesn’t mean to be in denial or burying your head in the sand about reality.
It means to understand that we are never really in control. That we can be resilient and move through life’s challenges with a growth mindset, open to learning along the way.
But we can’t always control when we lose a job, or someone dies, or a global pandemic impacts every single part of our lives!
Accepting the things you can control as well as the things you cannot is essential if you want to maintain a sense of harmony and peace. It doesn’t ever help anything to complain about what is, or to compare how things are now to the way they used to be.
This doesn’t mean it’s not ok to express your feelings, and to grieve when things change. Of course, we want to let our feelings out and feel heard and understood.
It becomes a problem when it is too frequent, or those around you are stuck in the negative and low vibration of non-acceptance of reality much of the time.
Acceptance of reality also doesn’t mean that you don’t take action on your goals or change things in your life that need to be changed.
Acceptance is actually the only way to make authentic change that is in alignment with your higher self. For example, if you are trying to change careers, but there is a global pandemic happening.
It’s very important to not compare yourself to others that have moved through career changes when times are more “normal” and to give yourself some grace. If you can fully accept the reality that there are different circumstances in the world right now, it will bring you more peace throughout the process of changing course in your career.
You will feel less fearful, less judgmental, and less stressed. You will be kinder to yourself and have more energy to move forward in your life.
It can be helpful to understand some of the indicators that you are not in the aligned energy of acceptance and are in resistance energy instead.
Signs that you are not in acceptance:
You find yourself thinking or saying:
“Why is this happening?”
“When will things change?”
“I don’t like what’s happening”
“I should have done that differently”
“I wish things were different”
“Why don’t they just understand?”
Resisting reality is normal, we all do this, it is just a practice of awareness of when this is happening and moving into nonresistance instead.
The more we can all be in the energy of openness, and expansiveness, remembering that all is well, and the flow of the Universe is here for us to grow, the easier and more fun life is.
Looking at each moment as if you had chosen it, rather than slipping into the victim consciousness that life is out to get you, is a great way to feel more empowered and at peace.
Life, and even challenges and perceived struggles are happening for you, not to you. They are here to polish you, to help your consciousness expand, to help you evolve.
There are some ways to move from resistance to acceptance and align with the energy of the divine, instead of staying stuck in the dense energy of fear and resistance.
Ways to move into acceptance:
1. Awareness:
You can’t change what you’re not aware of, so practice noticing when your mind or mouth slip back into patterns of judgment or resistance.
As you become more aware of your patterns and triggers to go into resistance mode, gently remind yourself “all is well exactly as it is.”
2. Practicing Non-Judgment:
Humans judge. Ourselves and others. This lowers our energy and pulls us away from the energy of acceptance.
Notice when you are judging yourself or another person or thing, and instead remind yourself that you are a lovely piece of the divine, just right, just as you are. They are also a lovely piece of the divine, just right, just as they are.
The kinder you can be to yourself and others, the more in the flow of acceptance you will be.
3. Practicing Self Love:
A big piece of nonresistance e is fear. If we can’t accept something it usually means that consciously or not, we are scared that we can’t handle whatever thing we are resisting.
This usually boils down to not believing that you are the strong, brilliant, connected, resilient being that you really are.
If you really remembered how powerful you were, there is actually nothing to fear or resist.
A very important component to maintaining an attitude of acceptance is knowing down to your cells that you can handle whatever comes your way. That you are capable and resilient.
If you believe that, there is no need to resist.
4. And that’s ok:
Begin bringing this little phrase into your mind and language.
The world is in a weird place right now “and that’s ok”
You feel sad that things are different right now “and that’s ok”
You’re not sure what’s going to happen in the future “and that’s ok”
Beginning to shift your language, helps your mind and body believe the message.
It really is ok now, and it will be ok in the future. Relax into the flow rather than fighting it.
Read more about Relationship Issues with Shana Olmstead.
