“Empaths and all sensitive people are pioneers on the forefront of a new way of being for humankind.” Judith Orloff, The Empath’s Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People
Many times when a client comes to me needing help with anxiety, part of the healing process is self-acceptance of themselves as an empathic, sensitive person. The vibrational frequency of my practice is a match for attracting mostly very kind and empathetic people. Much of our work together is the process of helping people understand their sensitivity and empathy and how this plays into the feeling of anxiety.
The nervous system of an empathic sensitive person is more, well, sensitive! This means that things that may not affect someone with the same sensitivity may really have a big impact on an empath. For example, an empath may hear about someone being hurt or in pain and may actually feel that pain or have an emotional response to this, while their partner who is not an empath will not feel any of those feelings.
How this relates to anxiety is this: in my experience, many people are actually mislabeling the feeling of anxiety. Often for the empath, it is just their nervous system being overloaded by other people’s feelings and their environment.
This is not a flaw, there is nothing, I repeat NOTHING wrong with feeling this way. Accepting, honoring, and working with this sensitivity can help with the understanding that it is actually a beautiful gift.
Rather than looking at the desire to stay home rather than go to a cocktail party to network as “social anxiety”, what if it is actually your soul telling you that your nervous system needs a break after a long week of work? Instead of feeling like there is something wrong with you because you don’t enjoy loud crowds or violent movies or sarcasm, what if this is actually a sign of being an evolved soul?
This empathy, and extreme compassion, means that you have had many lives, and experienced many things, that have allowed you to have empathy for all living beings because you have also been there and done what they have done. If everyone were empathetic and compassionate in this way the world would be a lovely place with no war or violence or poverty.
The only problem is that empaths tend to actually care too much about other people and their feelings, and not enough about themselves and their own feelings. This comes from a beautiful loving compassionate place. We empaths truly want to heal the world and wish peace for everyone.
The thing is, in empaths, this compassion can go too far and turn into too much worry about another, or suppressing your own feelings in order to make another person happy, or not speaking your truth in order to avoid perceived conflict. It can help you feel other people’s feelings, and if you are not aware they are not actually your feelings, this can really be a problem.
All of these things can lead to anxiety for an empathic person. Having a better understanding of yourself as an empath and tools that can help you stay in your own lane, not worrying about other people or being too impacted by the energy of others around you, will help you both to feel more loving towards yourself as well as releasing the label of yourself as an anxious person.
A few simple ways to embrace your lovely empathiness in order to feel less anxious are:
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Accepting yourself as a sensitive person:
If you grew up like many empaths, feeling shame about feeling too much, and being “too sensitive” you may have tried to ignore or push away this part of yourself.
Understanding and embracing yourself as an empathic sensitive soul can help you to feel less judgment about your perceived anxieties.
There is nothing wrong with you. Your sensitivity is a gift! I’m going to keep saying this, because it takes a while to change the neural pathways of self judgment. I’m going to help you, and I encourage you to keep practicing thoughts of love and acceptance for this magical gift of empathy that you were born with.
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Checking in with your own feelings often:
Empaths tend to focus on other people’s feelings and have a more difficult time understanding and expressing their own. You can tell how everyone in the room is feeling, but your own feelings can be a mystery.
This is why it’s so important to practice checking in with your own feelings. Starting at least once an hour, set a reminder on your phone to check in.
Place your hands on your lower abdomen, where your true feelings reside. Take a couple of deep slow breaths and ask yourself, “how am I feeling?” It will take time to feel your true feelings, and they will be calm and usually different from your thoughts when you do.
This practice will make it easier for you to identify when you are slipping into too much worry for other people, as well as when you are picking up feelings from other people that are not your own.
Your anxiety will naturally decrease as your awareness of your own emotions increases. As you begin giving other people back their emotional experiences and get better at not absorbing the feelings of others, you have more space for lovely high frequency loving energy in your body. This is the antidote to anxiety.
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Don’t help everyone with everything all the time!
I mean this sounds pretty simple, but as you increase your awareness of yourself as an empath, and become clearer on how you are really feeling the majority of the time, you will start noticing more and more how much you are really helping others too much. This takes energy away from really evolving and expanding in your own life.
There are many examples of what this looks like, big and small, and as they become clearer to you, and you stop doing this unconsciously, you will reduce your anxiety.
Simply waiting to answer a text until your energy feels in alignment, rather than feeling you have to do it right away because they will get mad if you don’t, is an example of not helping too much. This helps you maintain your own energy in a peaceful way and reduces your anxiety.
Saying no to a request for help when you are already feeling exhausted or overwhelmed is another example of reserving your energy for yourself, and will help you reduce anxiety.
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Simple energy maintenance practices:
These tips are helpful for anyone for anxiety, but are required for empaths in order to maintain a healthy energy system. Just like your car will stop working without gas, and your phone dies without being recharged, your energy system will stop functioning properly without maintaining its positive energy.
There are too many to list here, but here is a start:
- Meditation!
- Getting out in nature
- Being near water and hydrating your body
- Having a peaceful environment
- Reduce negative input from others/technology/social media, etc.
- Doing meaningful work
- Having a positive support system
- Taking breaks in quiet to recharge your energy system
- Visualizing beautiful white light around and inside your body, filling your with positive energy.
Again, there are many more, and I will continue to write on this topic in the future. My wish for you is that you embrace the lovely sensitivity that you were born with, and understand that anxiety is simply a sign that you may be out of alignment with what your empath self needs in that moment.
Read more about Anxiety Treatment with Shana Olmstead.
Shana Olmstead, Intuitive Consultant
I see my life purpose as helping people to awaken to the truth of their divine nature, the powerful spiritual beings that they are. I have assisted hundreds of clients in my therapy practice to wake up to the understanding that we are all made of source energy, and are here to increase our consciousness and joy to help the evolution everyone on the planet. I am so excited and inspired to continue helping people through their own awakening! Contact me to schedule an appointment in person in Kirkland, Washington or for a phone or video consultation wherever you are located.
